Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

I have looked everywhere
For anything that continues
Through this haze of days
And still shines and glitters
As if innocent of the smear
Of the dim Sun, the dim trees

I spill things onto the table
It is the one thing I know to do
“I don’t change” – I cling to
Sleep though the outside days
I wake without knowing the time
Or the day of the week

I am the same age as my father was
When he learned of the cancer
That would take ten years to eat him
One day he forgot to take his medication
“I won’t do that again.” He said.

But look:  Occasionally there is an unexpected
Day with that smell of earth after rain
And a breeze from somewhere tumbles the
Leaves and the grass and God’s hair, even.
It is then that I stop completely and
Stand near the front door
And am still
For a moment.